Maybe I need a refresher maths class to remember that 15 comes before 16 or maybe it was a case of “publish button” ignore given that this lesson proved particularly hard for me.
Which ever it be, lesson 15 is about being generous, not to others but to ourselves. Like most people, I like to think I am a generous soul and it is a word often used when others choose to describe me. However when it comes time to be generous to myself I am far from it.
I am the first to admit that I give too much of myself, often giving freely with little expectations of a return act. Rarely will I push my needs and desires over another’s, often preferring to compromise if it makes the road easier for others. Now don’t get the impression I am like a door mat who is walked over constantly, far from the truth. Most of the time I am relatively easy-going and relaxed about what I require from others within my SecondLife. I am someone who knows what they want, can and will articulate it, work hard to achieve it and when needed will make those difficult decisions for the good of not just myself but for others.
As I pondered how to incorporate the self-love assignment into my SecondLife I realized that I have already achieved a good balance. In fact I am more generous to myself than I’ve given credit, even if it isn’t the physical things such as good food and time invested into relaxing bubble baths.
Generosity to myself is in little signs such as surrounding myself in an environment filled with pretty things that make my heart sing. Keeping close to my SL family who although as different as we all are, are always supportive, be it encouraging my decisions or giving me those often required reality checks when my dreams run wild. Being appreciated by my friends who respect when I take time out from chatting to just organise my inventory it isn’t a sign of rudeness but instead understand how important my alone time is to my sanity.
So aside from reading that by being more generous to ourselves we will share more generosity with others. That by giving ourselves attention and care we are affirming what special people we truly are. The real lesson I’ve taken away this week, is that fear of focussing on myself would foster selfishness, which was totally unfounded.
Self-Love Assignment: This week, become aware of what you’ve been withholding from yourself. Have you been stingy with the time you give yourself to do things that are important to you? Have you been skimping on your own self-care?
Next, think of something you could give yourself this week that would be an act of generosity. Cook yourself an elaborate dinner. Luxuriate extra long in a candlelit bath, or schedule time to do something that you really enjoy. Notice how being generous with yourself elicits generosity from others.
© The Best Year of Your Life by Debbie Ford
This cute antique sewing machine vanity set is available for $250L till the end of September for round 3 of, The Kollective – Home and Garden Edition. Accessories: Lipstick, hair brush and nail polish bottles are included along with two styles of wood colour. An easy to use hud allows you to change the lace (not shown in photo) and metal colouring to suit your personal decor.