I could just leave this post at one word and everyone reading would nod their heads and come up with a thousand different versions of what it is and how it feels.
As one of the fundamental emotions that lives within us you would think falling in love would be easier. Instead mixed with the excitement of meeting that right person; the butterflies and nerves, is the baggage of past relationships.
Our insecurities jump for joy at being able to remind us of each and every failing. As we open ourselves up we put ourselves at risk. Those moments of doubt and confusion are nothing but downright scary.
For years I have struggled to deal with the fall out from a love gone wrong. The scars although faded still have internal raw edges. The memory of those wrongs written in the tears upon my cheeks.
The fear as I hand over the keys to my heart leaves me fighting for breath for I know better than most, included is the instruction book to hurt and destruction and the permanent damage done when it is used.
And for a moment ..when you stand beside me and say all those things every women wants to hear… I close my eyes … I breathe and begin to believe I can do this.